Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Personality types (#1 in a series)

There are numerous types of people who enter into the restroom. I've compiled a list just for the hell of it.

Personality Type #1: The Neandertal

This type of human being tends to speak in monosyllabic sentences when greeted by Your Ever-Lovin' Restroom Attendant. There are many theories as to why they speak so. The most universally accepted is that they are not too comfortable with the fact that there is someone speaking to them in a restroom. Other accepted theories include: they are shy, they really need to go bad, or they are just self-absorbed assholes.

An example of a conversation with a Neandertal:

Your Ever-Lovin' Restroom Attendant: Hi, how are you?

Neandertal: Ugh.

(Neandertal leaves restroom)

Your Ever-Lovin' Restroom Attendant: Have a nice evening.

Neandertal: (says nothing)

Neandertals can go so far as using words with more than one syllable. However, it is usually the work "okay," which can sometimes be written as "O.K." Thus, retaining their monosyllabic tendencies.

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