Monday, February 20, 2006

Some People Just Shouldn't Drink

Take this woman for example.

At 9:00 on Saturday evening her friends helped her get to the bathroom. She fell at least one time. I was a little alarmed to see that this was going on because it was too early for these sort of shenanigans. I usually see this sort of thing after the 11:00pm mark. However, time is relative and all that.

She went into one of the stalls while her friends waited for her. They apologized to me and I let them know it was okay. It happens.

"Sometimes it's best to just let it out," one friend said. "It makes you feel better."

I agreed. I then commented that I thought it was a tad early to be so drunk. Their response was that she had been drinking since 6pm. Well, that made sense to me. She was a rather petite woman. Plus, you can do a lot of damage in three hours.

Once the woman was done, she came out to wash her hands. In mid wash she turned around and entered a handicapped stall. Once again, she was in there for a few minutes. When she came out she apologized, saying that she made a mess in the sink.

What else could I do? I had to let her know that everything would be just fine and that I would take care of it. After she left, I entered the stall and checked out the sink. Not only did she vomit in there, she clogged the sink as well. I wanted nothing to do with that stall. Therefore, I closed it and considered it off limits the rest of the evening.

Luckily it was an uneventful night , so it wasn't an issue.

I spoke to the server that waited Drunken Barfing Woman's table. We got on the subject of how drunk the woman was. The server said that she didn't even drink that much. All she saw her drink was a half of a kir royale and a two sips of a glass of wine.

Not only was she a charming conversationalist, she was a cheap date.

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